I was actually pretty glad that the culmination of my recent travels to the Eastern Seaboard coincided with the 2013 Western Australian State Election, because it meant I was able to volunteer to wear the Green shirt again, even if just for a few hours.
Over the past couple of years I've invested a lot of my time and mind into slamming this incumbent government, so it was good to be back for the fall-out--and besides, one of my buddies was running.
Anyway, the result was, from my perspective, a monstrous disaster. I make no qualms about that being my position. I was really bummed out when the news started coming through. I guess I still am.
As a student of postmodern thought, it straightaway struck me that perhaps in kicking against the pricks so hard, we've created another monster. We've made him stronger.
Another Howard, Nixon, Reagan, Menzies, Thatcher etc - come to life like those Simpsons billboards in that Halloween episode where Paul Anka saves the town from destruction.
At the end of it all, instead of retiring to my Batcave to pour thousands of words of scorn and analysis onto this awful situation, I just wrote a song instead.
Here it is. It's slower than you might expect, I'll admit. But it's a savage response to a terrible result. The whole thing sucks. So I'm gonna walk away...
...but Mother Nature Will Have Her Revenge On Old Fatty.
Three times in the last couple o' days I have read people say "this is why I don't vote" in reference to some douchebag or other who is running for political office.
They're all players in some grand, supernatural Jewish conspiracy anyway.
Don't get me wrong, I understand where peeps are coming from with this, and - unlike the Australian Electoral Commission - I am actually cool with people not voting if they don't want to. Whatever you wanna do, man. I do hear ya: the lesser of two evils is still evil... that is true.
Given the choice though - and you are actually given a choice - what are you gonna do?
Option 1: Evil. The massive right-wing bigot with an irrepressible lust for power, no scruples and access to incomprehensibly large political coffers, unlimited PR and ubiquitous support from influential media barons, old money, royalty, clergymen, finance industry sociopaths and almost every trusted corporate brand known to mankind since Keating first floated the dollar.
Option 2: Lesser Evil. Back when they were young and idealistic, the former student unionist joined a party that used to be left-wing. They now keep their ideals a closely-guarded secret, publicly hovering somewhere around the middle of the political spectrum, at least when the press is looking. They are under the advice and very-watchful eyes of hack staffers who are always on the phone to the Gallop Poll crew, endlessly trying to suss out which particular bigoted contradiction the public expects them to uphold in any given week.
Option 3: Third Party. Choose between paranoid lunatics, religious zealots, and activists whose records you used to buy in the 80s but you're not so sure about them anymore because Option 1 and Option 2 have told you they're bad for the economy so many times that you're starting to actually believe it - but it's not like anybody votes for them anyway. Besides, the notion that politicians might stand on principle seems utterly preposterous. They are definitely either lying to you or to themselves, and sharing their blog posts on social media will result in your immediate ostracism from your work colleagues, brother-in-law, your former school chums and anybody else who still watches A Current Affair.
Option 4: Do Nothing. Sleep in on election day, have a really long shower, fire up the Xbox and make nachos. Drink heaps of liquor. Adopt a sense of smug superiority. If anyone brings up the vote count throughout the remainder of the election period, or if they mention the result in any way, make them feel as uncomfortable and self-conscious about the whole thing as you possibly can. When Option 1 gets voted in and outlaws the consumption of nachos and enforces mandatory church attendance on both days of every weekend - under penalty of corporeal punishment - remind everyone that you didn't vote anyway and that the situation is therefore not your fault.
To my mind, Option 4 is the shittest option, and if you read on now I'll tell ya why.
...and here's why I can't go for that.
Surely it's better to prevent the Biggest Jerk from having their Finger On The Button, even if it means voting for a career politician who in your opinion is not one hundred percent perfect.
In other words, surely you'd want to go for Options 2 or 3 as they are the most likely to keep Option 1 the fuck out of power - thereby increasing your chances of not being arrested for pursuing Option 4.
In the long run, this is very fucking important. When someone is allowed to take office, society allows them access to fucking guns, and funds, and manpower - entire armies of soldiers and cops - all out to prove themselves, all contractually obliged to follow the orders of politicians. Think about that. It's terrifying.
As a white male member of the pacified majority, it might be technically possible to drop out of the whole pantomime at the moment... but how often do you wake up one morning to find that yet another fucking thing that you used to be able to do is now illegal? In Australia it happens all the time.
Think about what you're tacitly endorsing here.
Ten or twenty or a hundred or four hundred or fifteen thousand good people who are just over it abstaining from voting cause they're all crooks m8 - or because the Lesser of Two Evils doesn't offer an absolutely flawless solution, or whatever - could easily be the difference between...
Damn straight! Al Gore vs. George W. Bush
Sure, one of those guys was an arsehat politician with very questionable family members who were the active enemy of free speech and artistic expression throughout most of the 1980s. He was a journalist - they can't be trusted - and he once scored a scholarship from the Rockerfellers. I'm referring of course to Al Gore. Sound the alarm.
He seems nice enough but frankly I don't know enough about Gore to call whether he would have been a very good president or not. And, especially given Tipper's record, he could have been a jerk even despite his apparent best intentions re: global warming and social justice and the fact that he, unlike his opponent, actually rocked up to work during the whole Vietnam thing.
Still, I doubt he would have made his way into the All-Time Top Ten Presidents list. It is possible to argue that he would not have been perfect...
"...and those who harbor them."
But the other guy? You have got to be fucking kidding!
George W. Bush was the most dangerously apathetic, incompetent boob in the 223 year history of the US executive office. He was a third generation drunken jerk - the Idiot Son of an Arsehole Son of a Nazi Sympathiser - a foolish elitist, a one-time deserter, a warmonger, suddenly in control of the most powerful empire the world has ever known.
Gore, for all I know, might also have been vulnerable to top level corruption. I don't know. Everyone has their price and he was, after all, a politician. However, Bush actively facilitated what happened next. His election by such a preposterous minority was one of the worst things that has ever happened.
America's going to be suffering the consequences of Not Voting For Al Gore for decades to come.
Bush did irreparable damage to East/West relations.
Worldwide we've all had our freedoms curtailed by simpering Allied governments.
It was the corporatocracy's finest hour.
Now, this analogy may not be watertight. I don't know whether Gore would have gone the same way in the aftermath of That Event (You Know The One)... but I doubt it - not the same as Bush did. The Powers That Be went to considerable effort to rig that 2000 election and it worked out very well indeed for them.
But I'm pretty confident that if every disillusioned left-leaning liberal who said fuck it, I'm not voting for either goon had actually turned out instead and voted for the Lesser Dickhead, then the Republicans simply wouldn't have had the numbers to pull off their swindle.
(Unless said liberals accidentally voted for Ralph Nader, but that's a whole other thing.) So there you go!
Have a think about that whole thing, I guess.
You don't have to vote, but if you're saying this is why I don't vote because of douchebags playing the same old power games, well that's understandable - but be aware that sometimes democracy is simply about kicking the biggest jerk out on their hole before they get a chance to ruin things for everybody. So, I suppose I am more NOFX than Propagandhi on this one... and that's the reason why I'll grit my teeth and go with Option 2 if there's no suitable Option 3, every time.
At least this dickhead isn't parading around talking about paedos this time. Source: here.
Don't get me wrong - I very much value the entertainment market - but one can tell that this is not what this SOPA bullshit is about, at all, due to the fact that a CEO said he wanted it to happen "in order to provide jobs"
The minute a CEO says it's about jobs, it is almost always in the interests of ordinary people - workers and professionals - to do the exact opposite of what they say.
Employees are totally expendable.
Look at forestry. We were told for years it was about job protection. Eventually the whole thing was mechanised and now they employ like ten people and the community - ecologically, financially, ethically - has lost everything.
The same thing will happen in the resource sector. Just watch.
These corporations know very well that the Internet is a force for change and they'll say anything they can in an attempt to have it regulated Big China styles so they can keep on fucking everybody over in order to increase shareholder value for the next financial quarter.
Just cause this guy is in music doesn't mean the same corp doesn't also own chemical weapons factories - it's all integrated.
If the mainstream music industry is losing money, it is almost certainly due to the fact that mainstream music is totally, and completely, fucking shit.
Progress is only actually progress if the resulting situation is better than the original was.
For example, the Citibank building in Perth is not progress when compared to the vastly superior Moir Chambers that once stood in its place. LOOK AT THAT SHIT. Fuck Citibank.
UPDATE: 29 October 2011 - Correction: Citibank actually took over the building after the new one was built. The new building was originally known as the 'New T & G Building.' Irrespective of this, the building is an architectural clusterfuck - an inferior shoebox - and regardless, Citibank can go get fucked for all of the many dubious things that they have done over the years. Both the building and the new owners suck arse.
Similarly, your monocultural pine plantation was a backwards move because the original wilderness was simply better, providing a thriving ecosystem that benefitted not just humanity but also the millions of life forms themselves.
What's that, multinational timber mill guy, you think you're better than them?
Listen, douchebag, your products suck and your mill is manned by robots and computers... so quit trying to manipulate your workers, whom you rip off with your stingy wages, into violently defending your share price.
Fuck your share price. If your company doesn't exist for the public good then it sucks and should be closed down.
The entire share market is based on fiat capital which doesn't really exist. Fiat capital is based on debt, and nothing else.
Therefore not only is it not REAL, the current economic structure is INFERIOR to the gold standard we had before, and was set up only to benefit aristocrats.
The capitalist fiat notion of 'economy' sucks and is not progressive.
It was originally all just based on British aristocrats enclosing The Commons and taking what was everyone's and making it their own.
Classism is pretty much the bullshit that fuels non-progressive politics. It's the aristocrats trying to maintain power. If they can't do it through force they do it through lies, such as organised religion.
What a crock of shit.
Now, before you start, I'm not valorising the working class. They are generally less educated and violent, and easily manipulated, and don't have the start-up capital to affect real change that the versatile middle classes do.
Plus most of them are now the pawns of aristocrats through their mindless brand loyalty; and the inherant anger that has them listening to mean-spirited wankers like Alan Jones and voting for neo-conservative creeps like Tony Abbott.
Fuck all neo-cons. Allowing homos to marry, for example, and other forms of legal social equity are advantageous to society because they spread love, not fear.
No true progress comes from fear.
War sucks for this reason and is just an excuse for non-progressive, non-accountable corporations to increase their share price in an economy that doesn't exist. It's the most transparent thing ever. Fuck you, Dick Cheney.
The government's role should be to keep such corporations (and real estate developers) in line, and also to act as a community chest enabling every citizen of the planet to be fed, clothed, educated, at least have a roof over their head and have access to water and cheap utilities and to be able to go to the hospital when they're sick either for free, or for cheap, or at the very least without upfront payment.
For this reason, paying tax is actually cool so long as the money is going to the correct places and not pumped into bullshit like the police force.
They are trained to hate you, and assume you are a criminal, to further the power of politicians and big business who, let's face it, are in bed together nine times out of ten, trying to make the world more shit--as I asserted above.
To prevent this, and to ensure the aforementioned positive uses of government, we should all be mindful to engage in a popular, pluralist democracy based on education, rationalism, empathy, responsibility and peace.
You are not an individual floating in space alone. Your lifespan is brief but your influence can be significant. Use it wisely. And, for god's sake, don't be some Prince's pawn.
In closing, feel free to disregard the above. If all else fails, have a sick time with cunts. Even if they're aristocrats. Friendship is mutually beneficial and a totally progressive situation.
I'm going to spare everybody the sentimental fucking spiel about The Hydey. It was what it was. It was good for ages, then it got shit because Paul Higgins sold it to Woolworths' subsidiary ALH. Then it was a corporate pub, not a family/community concern. It begun to smell and the beer got pretty bad, but at least heaps of apathetic kids worked there and would give me Coopers Red on my rider.
You can hear all about how cool The Hyde Park Hotel was in the new seven minute documentary called The Hydey, which was put together by local film luminaries Travis Johnson and Lindsay Hallam. I don't think you can view it anywhere cause it was a Town Of Vincent thing. They did a pretty damn good job of it though, and I believe there is a full length film in the works.
Anyway, after it was sold The Hydey was still pretty important to everybody, so when ALH made initial plans to close it by coming up with some convoluted lie about noise complaints (circa 2007), they were called out on their bullshit by a whole host of people including WAM and then- arts minister Sheila McHale.
The corporation clearly elected to bide their time and then try again, which they eventually did once the government had changed... and once everybody who used to like the place became utterly sick of watching the same five bands playing the same five shows to the same five cunts in a place that stunk (circa 2009).
So, in January 2010 it closed to live music for good, the bottle shop and bistro were ripped out and replaced with a Dan Murphy's bottle barn. The front bar was pretty much razed to the ground apart from a few walls/roofs and is being slowly re-constructed... into something that will be doubtless repulsive.
As evidence, please consider the following document:
We were assured by various people at ALH that there would continue to be live music at the venue once the renovations were completed.
(I would reproduce the latest correspondence I had with their state manager, but unfortunately it has been lost.)
However, I really fail to see how anybody is going to be able to fit a live band onto a stage 19.5 m² that faces directly into a bar, and where the best possible viewing space is approximately the size of the old saloon bar where we [the musicians] used to keep our equipment. (See p.3 and p.5 of the PDF for comparison.)
I mean, OK, it's possible. Prove me wrong, please.
But what I can see happening is: either I'm going to walk past and Luke Steele's old man is going to be playing the blues with, like, one other old bastard, or there's going to be some douche bag with a "salmon" (PINK you fuck) shirt on w/ popped collar playing Semi Charmed Life for the third time that evening.
At least there's a beer garden though. And it's worth noting that Vincent Council were pretty good in sticking up for the mug punter by refusing initial approval due to "...loss of entertainment and change in culture of the premises" (p.8).
This is something ALH were forced to refute (p.11), claiming that the front bar "...will achieve a new lease of life." (ibid.). Hahahahahaha. These people wouldn't know what cultural 'life' meant if Don Rat walked up and punched them in the face.
In any case, the renovations to the front bar are slowly under way and it will be interesting to watch.
